This post I made in July, 4 days before my birthday (the most painful day of the year for me), sums up my 2013. Everyone knows I’m such a worrywart, and I always freak out like the sky is falling, but I truly went through more stress, personal drama, and difficult changes this year than I’ve ever had to deal with before; I felt like my world fell apart multiple times last year. But in the end, I ended up gaining so much more. With every loss I suffered, I gained an even more valuable blessing in its place, bringing me another step closer to where I want to be. I have so many reasons to be happy, and I’m truly so grateful for everything I have.
I went into 2013 just hoping that I would continue to grow. While I definitely learned so many things about life, love, and the art of happiness, the moments that were most impactful include both the times I felt I hit rock bottom and the best of times. I will probably never be 100% satisfied with my job, and there will always be times when I feel frustrated, overworked and undervalued… But I am always grateful for every raise and every email from a client praising me for my work with my boss CC’d. I’m grateful for the opportunities I’ve had at Cicero that have enabled me to build such a marketable skill set that will allow me to be a strong and valuable asset for my next company. And though my DWI is a huge, expensive pain in the ass and waste of time, I’m lucky to have such amazing people in my life who didn’t judge me because of it, and helped me understand that it may have actually saved my life. Also, on a less significant level, I felt so grown up when I finally replaced my 240 with a beautiful Lexus, haha :).
And while I went through the biggest heartbreak I’ve ever suffered this year, I ended up capturing the interest of someone I have always been attracted to, but never even thought was attainable. When we started dating, I had to make a conscious effort to stop myself from falling because it was just too good to be true. But it’s been so easy to trust him over time, and for me to see more ways in which we match. Conversation just flows naturally between us, not only because we share similar interests, but also because we both love having engaging discussions and keeping our minds stimulated. I admire his passion for the things he loves and the people he looks up to. He works hard in everything he does, and is enthusiastic about succeeding and continuously improving himself. There hasn’t been a single day that’s gone by since we’ve been dating that he hasn’t told me that I’m beautiful… Not to mention that he has Brad Pitt’s face and Jesus’s abs. He’s perfect. This kind of amazing shit only happens in movies, I swear… Brian is my greatest gift of 2013.
There is one thing that stayed constant, though – in spite of all the mistakes I made this year, I never lost the support and love of my family. I could never feel lost knowing they’ll always be there for me no matter what. I am so lucky to have been blessed with such a wonderful family.
In a nutshell, I wouldn’t have had 2013 go any other way. I suffered losses, and made costly mistakes, but in the end, I would re-live it all over again just to be in this very moment, writing this post while taking a break from my segmentation report, with the sound of my family doing fireworks in the background and my puppy sitting in my lap. I truly have so much to be grateful for, and I have been armed with so much potential to achieve anything I set my mind to. These challenges I faced this year have only given me perspective that has strengthened my ability to love and show compassion to others. 2014 is MY year – the year of the horse. I can’t wait to see what the future brings, because it just keeps getting better and better.